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- Thou shalt not read thy Hemmings on company time, lest thy employer make it impossible to continue thy car payments.
- Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's car nor his garage, nor his battery charger.
- Thou shalt not store thy car out-of-doors except for the wife's Toyota.
- Thou shalt not deceive thy wife into thinking that thee is taking her for a romantic Sunday drive when indeed thou art going out to look at another car.
- Thou shalt not love thy cars more than thy wife and children.
- Thou shalt not despise thy neighbor's Edsel, nor his DeSoto, nor even his '47 Plymouth.
- Thou shalt not tell thy spouse the entire cost of thy latest restoration, at least not all at the same time.
- Thou shalt not promise thy wife a new addition for the house and then use it to store cars.
- Thou shalt not allow thy sons and daughters to get married during the car show season.
- Thou shalt not buy thy wife a floor jack for Christmas.
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